Coupling - The Chemical Equation

Coupling

Human behavior is one of the most interesting subjects for scrutiny.

With the new “addition” to my life, I am exploring finer aspects of couple psyche by drawing parallels to stuff familiar to me.

How often have you heard “ Nice couple, great chemistry”? ..Here’s an correlation of chemistry with relations :-)
Draw parallels between Human Reactions and Chemical Reactions and you’ll be amused at the familiarity they both have.

Organic chemistry describes Coupling as a reaction :-) Well it sure is ! The effects of which drill down slow on humans but on hydrocarbons it is quicker with metal catalysts.

As for us humans, coupling has many triggers – attraction, peer pressure, parents(yeah, they can drive us into coupling as well – does arrange marriage ring a bell?? ), boredom( for some..why not eh? ) , etc

Some of the chemical equations are queerly and if you may perceive it in a way, then humorously similar to the equations between couples…


Just a disclaimer, the events described are purely coincidental and bear no resemblance to any couple living or dead.. (trust me!)


Spontaneous reaction can proceed without being driven by an outside source of energy

What it means for us : Remember those days where you and better half are so freakin bored with monotony that you pick up a fight just to spice things up ? (Denial ? Well ..ask yourself you may have done it sub-consciously once in while ..Umm, are you smiling?? )

Acid based reactions: Acids are donors and base acceptors resulting in alkaline /neutral elements

What it means for us : Only 1 among the couple is on fire. The other one realizes the sensitivity of the situation and keeps mum..Some things are better left unsaid, aint it.. ? :-)

Catalysis : Reaction does not proceed directly but through a third substance - catalyst.

What it means for us : Entry in-laws, ex-girl, handsomer-couple..whoof..so many external factors can trigger as catalysts…Beware these lead to quick and irreversible reactions, even in chemistry.

Nuclear reactions : Reactions where a nucleus splits into smaller parts and results in radioactive decay , gives nuclear power enough to make a nuclear explosion!!

What it means for us : These are weapons of mass destruction, brain-splitting conversations which results in worthless conclusions and brain-drain..And ample waste of energy..

Nuclear chain reaction : Nuclear fission, neutron splits and triggers an event of reactions

What it means for us : Husband talks ..Wife snaps back, Husbands snaps back too.. …yeah ..Chain reaction..

Most chemical reactions are reversible.. ..Ahem such is not the case with human reactions. So be careful of which reaction you trigger, have fun, keep laughing and dont bother much...

Till Death Do Us Apart...

Indian mythology has always intrigued me. Though I must confess, I have never made a conscious effort to know mythology that deep….But I do like to sit down and listen or occasionally read about the majestic ways of our gods and goddesses.

I often wonder what a perfect match would be like. Well , to each his own, it really is a very opinionated and individualistic topic. For me, the answer lies in mythology. With a culture so rich, where could you better find a tale of togetherness?
I have always felt an affinity towards people with aggression that can be positively channeled to empower them.
When you speak of power and aggression, all attributes of Lord shiva come to my mind:- 'third eye' of destruction, trishul, Tandava(dance of creation and destruction). I am quite spellbound.. On the other hand you have Parvati who is a Sati incarnate..and a gentle aspect of Shakti. Another one of her names is “Sahana” or pure.

Together Shiva and Parvati are molded into each other to become a supreme Power. That is what they call Ardhanarishwari. Parvati when grown into a young woman after her reincarnation from Sati ,always knew her love for lord Shiva and after years of tapas , Shiva grants her wish…

Thereafter marriage and many other enticing tales begin..

Although a myth, one may find streaks of this tale in their own lives..where aggression and gentle power of silence come together ..quite miraculously..
I would like to write more about their stories after marriage, but I never write something I cant relate to.. So far , we’ll settle with ‘having found the perfect match’.

A fiction called Romance..

They have been an enigma , their stories speak of undying love for one another..Giving us the notion that " Love lingers on forever".. Such is the charisma of "Star-crossed lovers" in a human society.
Writers across the world have given them this identity in fairy tale romances.

Let's face it, had they lived together and put their love to test in this living world , they too would end up with the same problems as any of us.
Their story lived because "Romance" as a concept has been glamourized in our minds. Let's trace it back to all the fairy tale narratives which always end as ".. And they lived happily ever after.."
But when attraction and loving relationships face reality, then we see, how people grow out of relationships, compatibility is lost, circumstances and sometimes family-ties cause separation.. We have such star-crossed lovers walking amongst us everyday. Which is why fairy tale romances and a "romeo-juliet" or a "devdas" never fascinated me. They are no heroes to me...Maybe as a literary content, I could appreciate the work of the authors , but I find it hard to relate to..
When looking for ethereal magic in your Love story, do keep in mind , factors like compatibility, like-mindedness,clarity of roles in each others lives, trust and dependability. Contrary to the belief, a practical decision in choosing your partner can also give you a lifetime of togetherness and has it's own magical moments. Thus, dont always Just "follow your heart" blindly..cause sometimes its just mind over matter :-)

A take on love..

Love : With valentine's day marked on everyone's calendar, I had to write something about Love. Yes, I love my family,my mom who means the world to me. She defines love and unconditional giving.
But I feel valentine's day is a commercial stunt which makes "Love" sound like the most abused words of today...misunderstood, misinterpreted, casually-used, may have lost its noble demeanour for some of the singles still seeking it:-) Yes,I am talking about the love between a couple... I try to relate to it..understand it,define it..but alas it's intangibility leads me to conclude that it defies all reasoning...

The words that follow are not mine..but somewhere this is the closest I feel to understanding "Love" of this "kind"..I admire the writer's body of work,including his book "Coraline" which is in my collection..For now,here's his take on Love:

Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable.It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.